Since Mick and I have been married for 25 years, I'm not exactly worried about what any other guy thinks, especially some creepy guys at the gym! But just because you don't care what they think, that doesn't necessarily deter them!
So here are my top 3 solutions to deal with creepy guys at the gym…
Obviously, in my case, I really am taken, so if a creep at the gym approaches me he's likely doing so having already seen my wedding ring, so that didn't stop him.
But if you're not wearing a wedding ring, a quick, "Sorry, but I'm seeing someone…have a boyfriend/girlfriend/12 cats so I'm not interested…" should do the trick.
Even if it's not true!
Now, do I think it's sad that a woman has to say, "I have a boyfriend" instead of "I'm not interested?"
After all, this makes it seem like the unwanted suitor is more respectful of the (imaginary) boyfriend, and less respectful of the lady standing in front of them and what SHE wants!
Unfortunately, that is often the case! Why is that?
Well, because FEAR motivates these creepy guys at the gym…as in, the fear of maybe being beat up by some random dude… whereas, respect for other people does not motivate them!!
So, if they are still not motivated to leave at all, and are still being disrespectful, it's on to step two!!
For many creepy guys at the gym (and creepy women too — like I said earlier, they exist!) the idea is of course partly to get your number, but ALSO partly just to see if they can get under your skin. That seems to be one way to prove you're the alpha male at the gym, without antagonizing a buffer guy, and ending up wasting your gym membership fee for the next few months…
I know ignoring them is pretty much the same advice that you used to get in elementary school about ignoring your bullies. But the reason that it's more likely to work in this case is because, both bullies and creeps feedings attention. And when it comes to those Primary School bullies, when they bully you they get attention from other people who think it's funny. But when it comes to creeps at the gym, the only attention they are able to feed off of is your attention. So if you ignore them — act like you can't hear them because your earbuds are in, or because you're so engrossed in your workout — that takes all the fun out of it for them. Target not acquired!
Now, let's say you’ve found one of the creepy guys at the gym who are even MORE persistent, and not deterred by any of this. It's getting to the point where they yank your headphones out of your ear (what the h-e-double hockey sticks!!!) or are refusing to get the message from your silence.
Maybe they're even about to follow you out of the gym!
In this case, whatever you do, don't leave yet, or go to the front desk and let them know what's happening. Ask them to escort you to your car, and they'll do it!
Hopefully things never get to that point, but I also want to say that even if they don't…even if this dude is just wanting to talk to you about random things, about workouts, comments on how fit you are, etc…if at any point you feel uncomfortable, you are NOT obligated to keep talking to them just to be polite!
All creeps in the world rely on the hope that the recipient of this creepiness is going to be too polite to tell them to buzz off. You don't owe this person the time of day. Or anything else. (Although, if someone comes up to you and asks you what time it is, you can probably answer that! 😉 )